So we’re still “living in” Salem, Mass, on the boat, on a mooring and there’s more faded blue hair here every day than I ever saw at the Surrealist Magic Theatre on any given Tuesday at the Weathered Wall (Seattle cir1993).
You really had to be there.
But this place, Salem, this place is fucking cheesy, seriously witchy-cheesy, I mean capes and home-made brooms kind of cheesy, commodifide-religious-murder kind of cheesy. Really fucking cheesy!
But it wasn’t just a little while ago.
It was awesome just a couple of months ago when I was riding my bike in the aforementioned town all by myself right down the middle of the road, in the middle of the day doing 30kph with just a couple of masked Blue-Hairs-with capes scattered here and there for esthetics.
Well, those days are gone my friends. Now there’s 1000’s of them, and they, those cheesy blue-tinted morbid little freaks with bad fashion sense, are all driving their fucking cars in my town, parking and opening their fucking car doors…On…ME! Every motherfucking day!
There was a time when you could go into a liquor store and they would demand you put a mask on.
And I thought that was funny.
There was this incredible time, last year, when we could sail into a town like Salem Massachusetts, get a 3 lb lobster with all the trimmings and have the whole god-damn restaurant staff genuinely thrilled to see us.
There was this wonderful moment not long ago when I thought Hollywood would die the quick death it deserves.
Nah, not anymore.
Yeah, yeah, I’m happy for you if your businesses are back to thriving or at the very least on the up-swing but…
I miss people waving from across the street to perfect strangers, like us, just to let us know that we’re all okay.
I miss the quiet.
There used to be a time when we could anchor in a perfect little cove and not hear or feel a jetliner landing or taking off.
…not hear or feel the thrumming of a bridge in the middle of the night.
…or a helicopter hovering over a car wreck.
…or a bullet bike out running a cop at 2am.
Yeah, I kind of miss the pandemic.






